Not only in Hollywood

Last week as news spread of Angelina Jolie coming forward about having a "preventative" bilateral mastectomy, I was first shocked because I normally prejudge Hollywood types to be vain and inhuman in many cases. Then I was relieved for her and as a mom of little children, I celebrate what she did.

First I must digress. After the billions of dollars raised for breast cancer research and how far we have come in a few decades on breast cancer treatment, the biggest preventative measure we have is a mutilating bilateral mastectomy? I try to imagine how fast and furiously scientist and doctors would work if the only preventative measure for any male genitalia cancers was surgical castration...

Now back to Ms. Jolie. She apparently tested positive for the BRCA1 gene which in lay mans terms meant she had an 87% chance of getting cancer later. Those are horribly sucky odds, and that alone would make a decision of the magnitude she made much easier (for me at least).

So what exactly is a mommy to do? I myself have a very long family history of cancer. It flipping runs rampant and is the scariest and most horrible thing you can think of for any of your family members to go through. Every woman older than me that I have a bloodline with other than my own mother has had breast or some other kind of cancer. Sow when I was diagnosed with Ductal Carcinoma In Situ - the early stages of breast cancer, I was not shocked, however I was shocked that I tested NEGATIVE for BRCA1 and BRCA2. But that did NOT mean I wouldn't get cancer because I was sitting there in a doctors office WITH cancer!

I listened to a surgeon tell me the different options that I had as far as treating my cancer. I could have gone lumpectomy with chemo therapy and radiation, I could have had a mastectomy of the affected breast with chemo, I could sit and wait it out and see later if it started to spread (SHOCKED THAT WAS AN OPTION). And then the Big Kahuna answer came. I could do a double mastectomy, and remove my ovaries, because my cancer was estrogen fed, and if there were stray cells anywhere in my body me producing estrogen would feed them. This would give me a 95% chance of SURVIVAL - it meant I GOT TO LIVE!!! - So I said "Can we do it tomorrow?"

Now my decision may not be for everyone. I looked at our life. I had a 1 and a 3 year old - at the time only one had autism. I have a husband that was devastated by autism, this nearly crushed him and I knew he could not handle months and months of chemo treatment as well as caring for a special needs child. I have experience family members and friends getting chemo, and it makes you so sick, and it's very painful process. I didn't want that for myself or my family.

So for my life and my children, what worked best for our family was the decision to have a bilateral mastectomy and hysterectomy, at 41 years old. I was thrown into menopause, and thankfully there was no cancer in my lymph nodes, so I was basically a surgical case. I went through reconstruction, and the whole process took about 9 months. I worked a little slower than Ms. Jolie because I did have family help, but I did not have the army of hired help I'm sure she had. What my decision did was give me relief that I will not always be worrying with the breast cancer come back (even though it is a scary thought in my head daily). It made me want to be a healthy mom for my kids. It has made me a learning machine about my health and options, it has made me a better advocate for my children.

I admire Ms. Jolie for taking this brave step, but remind other women that it does happen amongst us. It wasn't the pretty celebration that it is publicized to be, it was emotional, and scary, and shook this woman to the core, and took all the parts that make you a woman away. After the shock and awe of all of that, you realize you where you were the day before the cancer call came in. You still have 2 kids that need you, a husband that loves you (even though this was a huge struggle for him he handled it well). AND I GOT THE BEST GIFT. I GOT TO LIVE!!!! I didn't want to just survive the cancer I wanted to LIVE, and raise my kids, and be silly, and happy, and enjoy the beautiful life, that may not be Hollywood, but it is awesome nonetheless.

To all you Dog Lovers - Are you ready for the AVODerm Challenge? #ad

  I was compensated for this sponsored post made possible by Mom Spark Media. Thoughts are my own.

Before I was a mommy to my sweet children, I was the mom to 3 dogs, Bosco, Peanut and Misto.  I loved them and treated them like my kids for years until the boys came along.  I still love them but I do admit they get shoved to the back of my list occasionally.

While the dogs are my running mates, and my play mates and I feed them, and walk them and bathe them, I want to do more for them.  As they are getting older, I think as in humans nutrition is going to be a larger part of keeping them healthy. 

I am embarking on the AvoDerm Challenge to see a softer, shinier coat in just 6 weeks. Guaranteed! 
 AvoDerm® Natural premium dog and cat food formulas are 
loaded with high quality meat proteins,
rich in omega 3 and 6 fatty acids from natural avocados,
completely balanced for the total health of your pet. 

They are giving away a $5 coupon for AvoDerm you sign up for the 60 day challenge.  

There is a sweepstakes on their website to win a year's worth of AvoDerm for your dog.  
How awesome would that be?!

As in humans nutrition is key to your health and well being, I take my health and my children's health seriously, and I'm kicking it up a notch for my dogs, who have been by my side through every imaginable up and down.  I owe it to them to make sure they have a healthy diet and a beautiful coat for me and my family to pet and love.

Are you ready for the Challenge?  Come on! 

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AvoDerm Website: http://www.avodermnatural.com/index.htm

I was compensated for this sponsored post made possible by Mom Spark Media. Thoughts are my own.


 

KNOTT’S BERRY FARM OFFERS MOM A FANTASTIC BRUNCH AND FREE ADMISSION TO THE PARK

If you are looking for something special to do for Mom on Mother's Day this has been a favorite of my family for the last several years, the food is delicious, and the opportunity to play at a World Class Amusement Park afterward is amazing.  

Mrs. Knott’s Chicken Dinner Restaurant has been a favorite family destination for Mother’s Day for over 70 years and this year they are offering moms free admission to Knott’s Berry Farm with their brunch purchase.   

           

This year Knott’s Mother’s Day Brunch will be offered at Mrs. Knott’s Chicken Dinner Restaurant, Spurs Chophouse and Wilderness Dance Hall all of which will include all of mom’s favorites including a breakfast station featuring made to order omelets, Belgium waffles, and cheese blintzes with Boysenberry sauce.  The carving station will be presenting roasted turkey, honey glazed ham, and prime rib carved to order.  Hot buffet items will include filet of salmon, sweet hickory pork ribs, old fashioned apple stuffing, cheese enchiladas, vegetarian lasagna and of course, Mrs. Knott’s famous fried chicken.  Knott’s Mother’s Day Brunch also includes unlimited champagne.

Knott’s Mother’s Day Brunch prices are $32.95 for Adults, $24.95 for Seniors (62+) and $17.95 for Children (3 -11).  Every mom in the party will receive a voucher for a free ticket to Knott’s Berry Farm, valid May 12, 2013 only. Reservation for Knott’s Mother’s Day Brunch can be made by calling (714) 220-5055. 

            For more information on all Knott’s has to offer, visit www.knotts.com.

           

About Knott’s Berry Farm:

The Knott’s Berry Farm property includes Knott’s Berry Farm theme park with dozens of rides, shows and attractions; the 321 room Knott’s Berry Farm Hotel with 20,000 square feet of meeting space; the Knott’s MarketPlace shopping and dining area and the 13-acre Knott’s Soak City Water Park.

Spring Break at the Lake

Something in my life, fat, thin, young, old, fit, or out of shape did I EVER think I would do would be a MUD RUN.  Well I have now completed 4 of them all Irvine Lake Mud Run.  They are a blast.  As a middle aged mommy and autism slayer and cancer survivor, the most awesome sauce thing I could do was challenge myself to get fit.  So while a half marathon is an event I plan and train for, I now throw in a couple mud runs a year because I need a little mud up my nose, and scrapes on my body to gain an appreciation for my long tiring boring runs of 10 miles on a dry paved road!

The Mud Run is not something I would do everyday, or for every race. The Mud Run is a challenge, it is kicking yourself up a notch.  There is so much about running a mud run that will take you out of your comfort zone and make you want to be more fit and BETTER for the next one.

Irvine Lake is located in Orange, California.  The course of the runs is a little bit more than 5K about 3.8 mile.  It is a moderately challenging terrain, with moderate/hard obstacles.  But there is options for every fitness and phobia level.   It is located in the picturesque Santiago Canyon area of Orange County.

The run itself is a blast, there are plenty of characters out there in costume, there are teams and families running together for their causes, and raising money for charities.  My favorite team shirt that I saw along the course was a group of people with "50 Shades of Filth" - it cracked me up. There are people having a good time, moving, getting or staying fit and for the most part people are having an amazing time.  Yes there are scrapes, scratches, twists and soreness that go along with it, but come on it's a mud run not a day at the spa! 

I finished this race in about an hour,  I did all the obstacles but the big slide, which looked amazing, but I just didn't have the time to wait in the line, I didn't see a person come off of that slide without a smile on their face, so I would venture to say it was a HUGE HIT with the participants.

The whole event is highly organized and well done, from bag drop off, and pictures, and showering and changing.  They make it easy for the novice mud runner to do this event with little to no logistical challenges.  The food vendors are good, and there is plenty of them, the music is great, the vendors are generous and the events have just been full of good people.  The Spring Break at the Lake was my 4th mud run, and I am planning on my 5th being Summer of Mud on June 22nd. The location is perfect, it's easy to reach in Orange County, it's affordable, and the course is something that all fitness levels can reasonably accomplish.

I promise you that you won't be sorry, you will not regret kicking up your fitness a notch, or getting dirty.  The event is great, and will leave you with such a sense of accomplishment, you will be smiling for days to come after the event, when after 4 showers you're still getting mud out of your hair ;)   Who is running with me??????

Rebecca
 

Just Keep Running

I am a runner, I don't know how it happened, but I now run.  I race, I trot, I walk, but I finish.  I'm a runner.  I was out on my long run yesterday when I got a news alert on my phone of the Boston Marathon bombing.  I got stuck in a down pour and ran home as fast as my chubby Italian legs would take me.  All I could hear in my head was Ellen DeGeneres voice as Dory in Finding Nemo "Just Keep Swimming". I just couldn't imagine that people were bombed when all they wanted was to watch friends and family members finish the BOSTON FRIGGIN MARATHON, the most recognized race in the world.  The runners wanted to get their medals have an awesome meal/party with their community and go home.  They were robbed of that, and that sucks.  They were bombed by a crack pot for some ridiculous heinous reason who thinks killing and hurting innocent people is going to serve their psychotic purpose.

We need to keep running, we "Just Keep Running".  It is the thing that a lot of us do just to escape the reality of a world full of psycho nut jobs that think blowing people us is a sport in itself.  I know I run to keep the filter from my brain to my mouth in check.  It keeps me from telling a lot of people what i REALLY think.  The crazy lunatics that think innocent people deserve to be maimed and killed, the crazy nut jobs that hate us just because we are American, or white, or black, or a runner, or a woman, or a child, or just for being PEOPLE.  The world is full of horribly psychotic lunatics.  We won't stop them from doing the most horrible things imaginable because we are too worried about hurting some one's feelings, so we strip search and pat down 8 year old boys, and 92 year old blue haired ladies to make a pathetic statement that our safety is the real concern (HUGE EYE ROLL).

We need to as a community, of runners, and just common sense people.  We need to be aware of our surroundings, we need to report suspicious activity, we are no longer a society that can tuck it's head in the sand, and think that all people are good.  Unfortunately there are crazy psychotic lunatics whose soul mission is to do us harm, and that is sad.  However, once that fact is accepted it is very empowering.

It gives me the power to call the police when people are at the end of my cul-de-sac smoking weed, it gives me the power to call someone out when they are treating others like dirt, it gives me the power to protect my kids from a bully or just a plain idiot.  It gives the power to be observant of the world around me, and make sure that I am doing my best to not put myself or my children in harms way.

This bombing was the worst type of scenario, it was an attack that was completely unpreventable, and meant to just hurt or kill as many as possible. A large public venue and event that is world known and people from all over the world participate.  It was meant strictly to paralyze us with fear, and hurt us irreparably.  THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE we can not let the mean crazy people of the world win.  It is tragic, it affected a community of people that I have begun to become enthralled with, and I have actually joined, because I RUN.  These are exceptional people that will run slow with you to train, help you run faster, pull you across a finish line when you don't think you can go another step.  It is a community of people that runs and raises funds for charities, it is my favorite part of community because there is a common bond and fellowship that doesn't exist in many arenas.  So for that I am horribly broken hearted that pure evil has stuck it's ugly face into such a "safe place".

But we will win.  We will, because we will, just keep running, and putting one foot in front of the other, while we pray for those in Boston and the horrible nightmare they have had to endure, we will grow stronger, and more resilient, and aware that there is now an evil force in our community, but keep running to push the as*hats out.  Just keep running, Just keep running, running, running, running.

Rebecca

Toughest Marathon Ever

This is a training program that I never ever dreamed I would be participating in.  Seriously, not ever did I think I could do this.  This is not about running, but it is about training, and perseverance, and dedication, and pain, and enduring when you don’t think you have another step in you to go.  It is exactly the way I felt on the two half marathons I ran last year. 

After a brief hiatus at the end of the year, I got back on the training wagon and have been planning these races, and training around my kids schedule and school, therapy, and our family.  I run and train when I can, early in the morning, late at night, on a treadmill, or out on the trails.  Whatever and wherever I can, to be able to finish this race next month.  Well low and behold Autism must have found out that I actually made plans, and it is trying to bitch slap me down every day.

So, I’m trying my best to stay on track.  Autism has for the last few weeks, hijacked my older son, and is taking him on a horrible ride.  We are exhausted, worried, confused, and just plain sad.  He was making these great strides, and now in the last few weeks a major back slide.  Activities he loved are now cause of tantrums, places he liked make him troubled, he is tolerant of very little.  His frustration level is high, as is ours.  My sadness exists on so many levels, because I frankly cannot stand watching my child go through this neurological torture.  The fact that this is Autism Awareness Month, is just irritating and a farce that makes me crazy.  TRUST ME, WE ARE AWARE!!!  I do not get what in the hell anyone thinks we should be celebrating.  Should I be celebrating the sleeplessness, the tantrums, the rigidity, and the frustration from not being able to communicate with my child?  Which part are we having the party for??? The friends that have disappeared off the map because they don’t want our kids to play together?  The friend that don’t invite us anywhere because we look haggard?  The family members that stare at our kids like they are going to blow up?   We need action, and we need people to start training and working for this MARATHON OF AUTISM. The wave is here for crying out loud, and there are very few who are doing anything about it, and this mother is beyond PISSED.  Where is the research?  Where are the services?  Where is the help for these kids, as they get older?  Does anyone not see that the number is now 1 in 50, WAKE UP!!! When we were diagnosed 4 years ago, the number of kids diagnosed with 1 in 150, then 1 in 110, then 1 in 88 and last week the CDC reported that the number of kids diagnosed with Autism is 1 in 50.  The finish line is getting closer.  There are going to be thousands of these kids growing up and at the rate our lame ass government and education system is going we are doing a disservice to these kids, and everyone is going to end up being injured.  (SORT OF LIKE RUNNING A MARATHON WITHOUT TRAINING FOR IT – See what I did there?)  So perhaps while we are lighting things up blue, we could use some of that effort at a marketing campaign – to actual help for the families of autism???? Just a thought.  Perhaps everyone could get off of Sandra Fluke and her free birth control and focus on a problem that might actually affect people that aren’t selfish ho bags.   Just saying’.

 

 I am doing my best to remember minute by minute the life of both of my kids are a marathon.  I have to be patient, and strong, and endure every single kind of terrain that comes with autism.  Right now I feel like I’m running on a 95-degree day in the desert up hill with no water and no relief in sight, just like I did running up Irvine Avenue at mile 11 up a hill that was torturing me.  My children do not have the luxury of saying they don’t feel like having autism that day.  Neither do I.  I  no longer have luxuries of saying that I don’t want to do that, or I want to go there, or even making a plan is a JOKE.  I have to train, I have to be strong, I have to have endurance, I have to have patience, I have to have stamina, and I have to have the integrity and sportsmanship of an athlete to get through autism and a marathon.  Autism is a life long marathon; it is the most important training of my life, of our lives.  This life long marathon of autism requires that we be in shape and sharp, mentally and physically.  It will take more from your body than people can possibly fathom.  I never in my life thought sleep was important, until autism robbed me of it. 

I will run this race in a month, and I will be well trained, probably not trained the best.  But it’s just like being an autism parent.  I am doing the best I can with what is put in front to of me.  I don’t know the most, I don’t run the fastest, but I put my heart in this race, my entire heart, and do my best every single day to love and care for my boys with every single cell of my being.  I will give this race all I’ve got, because my boys deserve the mom that doesn’t give up.

Rebecca

A Motherhood Interrupted and Renovated

I remember when I was pregnant with my first child, I had in my head, planned out his whole little life, where he would go to school, he would be this amazing baseball player, and he would love to do extreme sports and activities with his mom, and his life would be awesome, and I would be this awesomesauceness of motherhood that would be a force to be reckoned with.

I had the same plans for my 2nd child.  He was going to be this crazy smart, golfer, that would travel the world, and take his mom with him everywhere to make sure every detail of his life was flawless and taken care of.

Those were those dreams I had under the pregnancy hormones.  After those babies come, and you are just so in love with them, the baby smell, the little feet, the cute little butts, just everything about being a mom is crazy wonderful, overwhelming, and amazing.  I love every second of it.

Then my awesome Motherhood was interrupted by the autism diagnosis on both of my kids.  It just slammed the door of the motherhood that I had planned for myself and my children.  But I kept trying to open that door, pounding, scratching, kicking that door to get it to open - like a prisoner trying to escape a jail cell.

Autism didn't just rob me of this mom that I wanted to be, it made Motherhood this labyrinth of a maze that no one gave you a map for.  You get handed a prescription for OT, Speech and ABA and get told we'll see you in 6 months.  HUH?!!  Well now what?  I clearly can't go to Gymboree, or Tumbling, or swimming lessons like I wanted.  But WHAT DO I DO NOW???  No one tells you?

So as I was left treading water in the sea that is Autism,  all these things about me as a person and a mother were sinking around me.  I lost this identity that I had made in my head about this mom that I wanted to be. I had friends that had normal kids that I had nothing in common with anymore, I was home or at therapy 40 hours a week with my kids, and it just hurt my heart too much to go on play dates with typical kids and see how far behind my kids were, and watch people stare at my boys like they were a circus sideshow.

After a few years of maneuvering and maturing I have got the autism thing down for the most part, I do research, I have an amazing group of moms that I have trudged this road before me and I take all their information and advice, and run with what works for my family.  We have the kids on a great therapy plan, I'm involved in their school, and I try to saturate them with social situations as much as possible.

As I was out on my run tonight, thinking about all the crap that rattles around in my brain.  I have been training for a half marathon that I'm very excited for.  I'm a slow runner, like old man shuffle type of pace, but I still like doing it, and hope I improve.  I have the opportunity coming up with some mom bloggers to do a relay race over 200 miles, and I'm getting anxiety about it.  You see, my motherhood is interrupted.  I don't get to be the athlete that I think I am in my head.  Autism sometimes yanks my chain and does not allow me to train like I would like, which is why I'm out running at 10pm after everyone is asleep. I am crazy determined to make this happen, I will have to step a lot of things up to do this but I feel confident it will work out.

I also wanted to go to this event tonight for this group of women that I think are really cool.  But I have kids that sometimes my husband can't handle alone (I don't ever get that option) and I have to decline going to things because my kids need me.

I am not the mom, the athlete, the weight loss success story, that is the perfect picture of Motherhood that I had envisioned in my head when I looked at my babies for the first time.  Sometimes I am a HOT MESS, I don't eat right all the time, I gained some weight back, I am struggling keeping on my training plan for the half marathon (but I'm doing it),   But the clarity My motherhood was interrupted and had to be renovated to fit autism into it.  And when we made room and remodeled our lives to include autism, somethings didn't get included in that "house", something are out in the storage shed or the yard.   The family is in the house.  Running, blogging, social events, and sometimes unfortunately some friends are out in storage or in the metaphorical backyard, I visit the yard when I can, when my "house" is in order

. The renovation of my life made me stronger that I imagined.  And you know what?  That is exactly the kind of awesomesauce poured over the hot mess I am that has brought me peace.